My Daughter Sarah and the Last Ten Days - A Year on the MRI Result

A year ago...last Ramadan...the negligent servant was worshipping his generous Lord with worship unworthy of His blessings, His honor, and His salvation of this negligent one, His protection of him, and His covering of him...Thoughts of Taraweeh prayers were scattered, and Quran recitation was preceded by those who no one takes as a role model. The last ten days came...so I said to myself: Now I will make up for what I missed...but it didn't happen! The twenty-seventh night came...so I said again: May this be the Night of Power...now I will make up... That night passed, and the worship was like any other...it did not fulfill the blessings, nor the greatness of the Lord, nor the hope of companionship in the loneliness of the grave, nor the scarcity of provisions, nor the abundance of sins from which I hope for purification, nor the ambition to enter Paradise without reckoning or punishment, nor the limit that makes me in harmony with myself so that I do not feel the falsity and lack of sincerity when people think I am better in worship than I truly am. That night passed, and I woke up the next morning with these meanings stirring in my chest...but at the same time, I felt that Allah -perhaps- will not punish me in the Hereafter! And I ask Allah that this not be an act of arrogance towards Allah but rather a good opinion of Him, glorified be He. But how?! How am I "teaching people" not to be deceived by Allah's generosity and thus fall short of His rights, glorified be He? I did not know how...but what I know is that what Allah has done with me in the past of my life is not an act of deception, but rather upbringing, kindness, and purification as I believe. That morning...Sarah, my eldest daughter and the one most like me in her thinking and personality, came to me: "Daddy, my knee hurts." We had done tests for her, taken her to doctors, and given her medicine...she would improve, then the pain would return. I took her to a doctor who is a brother and a friend...he said: (No! This swelling was not there before...get her an MRI). I thought to myself: (After Eid?...before Eid?)...I felt something pushing me to not delay... I went with Sarah to the specialized center, they took an image of her knee...they asked me questions I did not understand the reason for at the time...I took the result and left the center with Sarah. I reached into the MRI envelope to read the result, expecting it -like the previous ones- to have nothing important...at most: a simple disease easy to treat. But it was completely the opposite of what I expected! I read the word Sarcoma (a type of cancer).. Thanks to Allah, tranquility descended upon the heart even though the news was completely unexpected. And as if the answer to my question: How do you reach your desires with little work?!...as if the answer came to me: trial and patience! And by the grace of Allah: a year has passed since the incident, during which there were situations from the consequences of the disease...I do not remember that "anger" at fate ever entered my heart, but rather the companionship that Allah wanted good for me -as He has been patient with me and will be patient with me- dominated my self, and the hope that Allah, by His generosity and kindness, did not need the negligent servant to be purified in the Hereafter, but rather his sins are removed from him in this world. A year has passed, and neither Sarah nor I "philosophized" about what others outside our trial might philosophize about!! We did not say "What is her fault that she gets sick?"...for what my Lord has taught me is that He is All-Wise, All-Knowing... May He have mercy on Sarah and have mercy on me and have mercy on her mother and our family and loved ones with this trial if we deal with it well...so that we are occupied with our actions, not with His actions, glorified be He, for He (is not questioned about what He does, but they will be questioned). A year has passed, during which we published the journey of certainty so that people may enjoy with us the coolness and sweetness of certainty... And Sarah's morale has risen, and she has learned religious meanings in her childhood... And the determination to serve the religion of Allah has risen... And in all of this, if there was any favor, it is for Allah alone, He is the Generous, the Great, the Merciful...to Him be praise, to Him be favor, to Him be the good praise. And if there was any shortcoming, I seek forgiveness from Allah, and I have a good opinion of Him, glorified be He, that He preserves the love for what He has bestowed upon His servant from His love and honor, He is the Forgiving, the Loving. And I ask Allah with that the complete healing of Sarah and all Muslim patients. I ask Allah to heal your children and loved ones and to grant us and you in the last ten days acceptable good deeds.