Episode 14 - Don't Be Depressed!
Do Not Despair!
Regret Between Repentance and the Devil's Tricks
Allah forgives much, and we search our deeds to find that we have sinned against Him greatly. We regret at that moment, and this regret is required to drive us to sincere repentance. This regret should be a temporary feeling that immediately drives us to correct our mistakes with positivity and good thoughts of Allah that He will help us and accept our repentance and give us another chance to set things right.
But sometimes things go differently with one of us, instead of this positivity and good thoughts of Allah, he freezes at the stage of regret and dwelling on memories and self-flagellation and self-loathing, thus corrupting himself and becoming bitter. And he begins to feel that this trial is pure punishment with no mercy in it, a crushing burden that leaves no room for standing, because Allah the Almighty, after giving him chances in the past which he did not utilize, has detested him and is angry with him and will not give him another chance.
Then the feeling of estrangement between him and his Lord, glorified and exalted be He, creeps in. He feels that the door has been closed, that his supplication has been rejected, and that misfortune has struck him for the rest of his life.
Brother, sister, beware! This is a trick from the devil, indeed it is one of his most dangerous tricks. He makes you initially imagine that blaming yourself in this way is required because it is an admission of guilt, but the devil has stopped you at the stage of blame and regret and made you exaggerate in it to lead you to imagine something very dangerous, to imagine the harshness of fate and of His destiny, glorified and exalted be He. And in this moment of bad thoughts, you will feel the terrifying loss.
When your trial intensifies, you complain of your grief and sorrow to Allah, so where will you flee? To whom will you take refuge? To whom will you plead? Whom will you hope for? You will feel the terrifying loss, and this is what the devil wants for you: to be cast out from the mercy of Allah, for he does not want to see those who are merciful or those who hope for the mercy of Allah the Almighty.
The Devil's Methods of Causing You to Despair
Brother, sister, note that the devil will not come to you directly through doubting Allah's forgiveness, he will not say to you, "Allah is not forgiving and merciful," this is a clearly failed attempt. But he will come to you through another door, he will say to you, "Allah is forgiving but you do not deserve His forgiveness because He gave you chances in the past and you did not utilize them." "Allah is forgiving but your nature is evil and unfit for reform." "Allah is forgiving but you are a failure who cannot do what deserves His forgiveness." Thus the devil comes to you.
What does the devil want from this? He wants to throw you into depression, the depression that paralyzes your will to correct your situation and return to your Lord, glorified and exalted be He.
There are scientific terms that describe the symptoms of clinical depression, including deep feelings of sadness, exaggerated feelings of guilt, lack of value, and lack of motivation. The devil freezes you at the stage of feeling guilty and makes guilt dominate you in a deceptive way, and makes you feel that you are worthless, unredeemable, unfit to be among the close servants of Allah, to paralyze your will to obey and your motivation to change and abandon sin, and to lose the happiness and joy in your Lord and Master, glorified and exalted be He. The devil does not want you to love your Lord.
Good Thoughts of Allah and His Forgiveness
Brothers, the child who is punished by his father loves his father if he knows that this punishment is driven by his father's love for him and his concern for his welfare. But if he thinks that his father punishes him out of hatred, then the child's heart will harden towards his father. And Allah has the highest example, and Allah has the highest example.
So hold fast to the rope of good thoughts of Allah, the Accepting of Repentance, the Forgiving, the Pardoning. He is too merciful to wait for the sins of His believing servants to strike them and take them out of His mercy and not give them another chance.
In the hadith narrated by Muslim from the Prophet peace be upon him in what he narrates from his Lord, glorified and exalted be He, He said: "A servant commits a sin and says: O Allah, forgive me my sin. So the Blessed and Exalted says: My servant has committed a sin and knows that he has a Lord who forgives sin and takes account of the sin. Then he returns and commits a sin and says: O my Lord, forgive me my sin. So the Blessed and Exalted says: My servant has committed a sin and knows that he has a Lord who forgives sin and takes account of the sin. Then he returns and commits a sin and says: O my Lord, forgive me my sin. So the Blessed and Exalted says: My servant has committed a sin and knows that he has a Lord who forgives sin and takes account of the sin. Do what you will, for I have forgiven you. Do what you will, for I have forgiven you."
Of course, Allah the Almighty does not inspire a servant to sin and say, "I will forgive you no matter what you do." The meaning of the hadith is that it has preceded in the will of Allah the Almighty that the servant, no matter what he does, if he repents sincerely every time and resolves not to commit the sin, resolves not to commit the sin, then Allah the Accepting of Repentance will keep on accepting his repentance, Allah the Forgiving will keep on forgiving him, Allah the Pardoning will keep on pardoning him, and He knows, glorified and exalted be He, that this repentant servant will sin in the future.
Responding to the Devil's Whispers
Brother, do not despair of the mercy of Allah to help you approach Him and enjoy His favor. If the devil comes to you and says to you, "You do not deserve the mercy of Allah," say, "Yes, I do not deserve it, but He, glorified and exalted be He, will have mercy on me because He is too noble to deal with His servants as they deserve."
If the devil says to you, "Allah will not give you another chance, for He has saved you before and you did not preserve the good," say, "Yes, He will give me and save me, for He is the Pardoning, the Forgiving."
If the devil says to you, "Allah is testing you as a punishment because He hates you," say to him, "Rather, He is testing me to purify me and raise me."
If the devil says to you, "You are too low to deserve the mercy of Allah," and be sure that he has greatly wronged Allah, for Allah, glorified and exalted be He, has given him chances and tested him with lighter trials to awaken him from his heedlessness, especially regarding the arrangement of priorities in his life and the deeds of the heart, but this weak servant returned to the same mistakes, so this greater trial came. He regretted and felt pain and feared that this punishment would last and intensify and perhaps exceed his ability to bear it, which increased his pain and regret.
Then Allah willed that your companion read a great hadith, he had read it before, but this time it came to him as a lifeline from Allah and a balm for his wounds. The hadith was narrated by Muslim and in it Allah, glorified and exalted be He, intercedes for some of His creation to bring out people from the Fire, the good among them is very little, and yet the mercy of Allah will encompass them as well. So Allah, glorified and exalted be He, says: "The angels interceded, and the prophets interceded, and the believers interceded, and none remained except the Most Merciful of the Merciful." Glory be to Allah! Our Lord, glorified and exalted be He, brings out people after He has purified them with the Fire and enters them into Paradise by His mercy, not by their deeds.
This part of the hadith shook me and awakened me and saved me from the depression that the devil was trying to throw me into. I said to myself, "Yes, I have sinned, but I think that Allah has made me better than those whom He has brought out, for if the mercy of Allah has encompassed them, it will encompass me in this world and the next." So a great surge of love for Allah and tranquility in His mercy was injected into my heart.
Conclusion: Do Not Despair of the Mercy of Allah
Brothers and sisters, Allah the Almighty is much, much more merciful than what the devil may prepare for us in moments of despair. "Say, O My servants who have transgressed against themselves, do not despair of the mercy of Allah. Do not despair of the mercy of Allah, for Allah forgives all sins. Indeed, it is He who is the Forgiving, the Merciful."
The summary of the episode: Do not let the devil throw you into depression, but turn your regret into a positive force to draw closer to Allah, the Accepting of Repentance, the Forgiving, the Pardoning.
Peace be upon you and the mercy of Allah and His blessings.